Relationship Advice → Discussion•
Mixed Signals!

NerdoCJan 31, 2006 7:12am
Ok guys this may seem a bit long winded but its kinda annoying me know and i think i need a bit of independant perspective.

I got to college with a girl
We kissed a couple times last year(when both drunk etc) then stopped.
Flirting kinda carried on since however i figured nothing would come of it so i cut my losses and began a relationship with her flatmate.
Girl A didnt seem too impressed with me seeing her flat mate but never openly admitted it.
Relationship with flatmate ends , girl A and i see more of each other(drinks after college etc) and kiss.
Girl A explains no more can come of it due to-
1) Awkwardness with flatmate(whom she isnt too fond of anyway)
2) Undisclosed 2nd reason which i was lead to believe by her , is a lack of interest in me

I stop coming onto her. We are out however one night she tries to kiss me.I told her to stop that thats not what SHE wanted.Couple nights later i try kiss her she responds with the same way saying its not a good idea.

We tend to argue a lot from then on , everything id say would cause arguments and vice versa i felt like i was loosing my friend.

Again we go out with a group of friends i try avoid her to save any arguments errupting. The group of friends go back to her place and a bunch of us sleep together in the same bed(pass out moreso than sleep)
I wake spooning GirlA (although she wasnt there when i went asleep...this has happened before) things get quietly intimate between us however there is no kissing , i try to kiss her she says no and pushes me away. I take it on the chin and go make a cup of coffee. On return to her bed i lay back down and she wraps me arm around her!

What am i meant to think her girls?

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PerkoJan 31, 2006 7:18am
Ok, I am not a girl, but my viewpoint is that this gal is playing with you. She's in control and she likes it that way. I'm going to use an analogy which women might find offensive, but I actually got it from my sister: Some women are like cats with mice; when a cat catches a mouse, they usually don't kill it. They slightly disable it and prolong their delight (and the mouses's suffering) by duplicating the thrill of the chase over and over again.

A lot of women are like that. They love to see men squirm. Maybe there were some asshole guys in their past, maybe they're just spoiled. In any event, and for whatever motivational reason (none of them warrent your time and effort to pursue, I might add) that's what I'm sensing here.
NerdoCJan 31, 2006 7:21am
I like the way you think man , thanks for the advice ,if been toying with that theory for a while now and i think you may be right. Its unfortunate though because i do have feelings for the girl .

I think i may be getting my come-up-ins for being an asshole in the past ha ha ha

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noelJan 31, 2006 8:34am
Screw her..not literally. I think shes playing a game. I myself dont like games. My boyfriend right now plays them and I am getting tired.

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finestkindSep 22, 2006 8:45am
She's a bitch, playing a bitch game. It sucks, but it happens to everybody eventually. Cut your losses and move on before she rips your fucking heart out.

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Thomas-JeffersonNov 1, 2006 3:02am
If you have feelings for her you might want to discuss it once more, while (reasonably) sober. If that doesn't work I agree w everyone else.

HeirOfSilenceNov 12, 2006 12:40am
Be careful, it's a treacherous road. There are two basic scenarios I'd say are likely

1) She's the type of girl who, insecure about herself and afraid of being hurt, plays with people to make herself feel more in control. This type of girl basically ends up hurting those around her, in the end, whether she wants to or not

2) You [flacked] with her heart, and now she doesn't know how to feel or act around you. She feels drawn to you and disgusted with you at the same time

In either situation, tread carefully. Women are like cats... you can generally only approach them if you don't make any real sudden moves. Of course, this is just guessing from my impression of your situation, off of what human nature I'm familiar with- I don't know you or her. Best of luck, though :)

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Thomas-JeffersonNov 12, 2006 1:15am
you right about sudden emotional moves, thats true in male/male and female/female platonic relationships and business deals too. Go too far too fast, and suddenly you've got 'em spooked. People like a slow build up of mutual contributions to the relationship, be it sexual, financial, or just a conversation at the bus stop.
426319Jan 26, 2007 3:12am
Perko, noel..anyone

what is up with datura?creativeJUNK!

HELP(: please...


Mixed Signals!

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